About once a month I get a very stressful dream like I had last night, and it is always on the same topic.
I started out going to Berklee College of Music after high school for a degree in audio engineering. At the time it was one of only two programs that offered a 4 year degree on audio so you could work in a recording studio. After a year I realized that Berklee was really heavy on you being proficient at your instrument, in my case drums which I was not really that good at compared me to people like my roommate that was only studying drums and practiced 6 hours everyday and I only practiced 1 hour a day since I had engineer courses.
So after a year of Berklee I applied to transfer over to the University of Miami which was the other school that offer a 4 year degree. I was so excited to get in to Miami because I was not sure I had good enough grades to get in, and I was even more excited to be in the audio engineer program. They only allowed 18 new students in a semester in this group. However you had to maintain a grade point average of 2.8 to stay in the program, if you fell below that you would get kicked out. I worked my ass of the first semester and made the dean’s list while a couple of others dropped out of the program.
The dream I get centers around me graduating from college. Sometimes I find myself after the last final exam and my parents are coming down for graduation the next day and I am wondering if I passed all my finals. I always seem to remember these dreams the next more because I always wake up in a cold sweat stressed out.
Finishing college for me was a big accomplishment, it is one of the proudest things I have done. Not only was school hard for me, I actually got two D’s on my last report card and just barely stayed above the 2.8 average at the end. The course kept getting harder and harder. And it was not over after I graduated since I had the added stress of paying of all the student loans for years after that.
I think the reason I have these dreams is because of my internship. I absolutely loved my internship, I got to travel around the world on a cruise ship running sound for many of their production shows. But when my parents came down for graduation I was only done with all my classes and was allowed to attend the ceremony but I was not handed a diploma that day, it came in the mail a year later.
I remember celebrating with my Mom and Dad and my friends that day but I never celebrated when I got that simple piece of paper in the mail. It is something I work so hard for and payed for that perhaps be not celebrating or taking a photo the day it arrived I have haunted my self with stressful dreams the rest of my life.
So why write this? Perhaps by telling my story it might help someone else to remember to celebrate, and I figure that by making this video and editing it will repair my subconscious in to knowing that I actually graduated!